Once again, I'm working my way through the readings of the Celtic Daily Prayer from the Northumbria Community. The opening litany includes the Kyrie, which asks "Who is it that you seek?" The community responds "We seek the Lord, our God." Then we're asked four questions - "Do you seek Him with all your heart?" "Do you seek Him with all your soul?" "...with all your mind?" "...your strength?" For a long time, for each question I read the response in the text "Amen. Lord have mercy" ready to move on to the next section. Sometimes, in a bit of self honesty, I would pause on one or the other and think a minute, maybe responding with a "working on it" or "not so much so far."
Reading the response today, and thinking of yet another variation on the theme, it dawned on me that the supplied phrase, "Amen. Lord have mercy" really was the most complete, honest answer I could use. "Amen." So be it. It is as it is. Yes, I'm seeking with all my ____, but I know that on some levels it's not a full-in seeking. "Lord, have mercy." God, forgive me for not opening my heart completely to you and allowing all of You to illuminate all of me.
A few days ago we sang a song in chapel with lyrics that capture the essence of that prayer. The chorus says it best: The more I seek, the more I find. The more I find, the more I love. Lord, as I seek You, help me find You. And as I find You, may my love for You grow deeper and deeper, until I can fully respond "Amen! Lord, have mercy."
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